31 December 2018

[Bess Tuggle] - Happy Mexico Beach Strong New Year!

Bless my lil’ heart…  Just when I get used to writing 2018 on everything it goes and changes on me again.  As if the day, date and month weren’t tough enough to keep up with.  The older I get, the quicker they all seem to go by.

When I was little, New Years Eve was always celebrated at my grandmother’s house.  The whole family piled in – and believe me, there’s a lot of us. The basement was packed, good music playing, drinks, dancing and everyone had a good time ushering in the New Year.  It wasn’t until years later that I figured out that they faked us kids out when we were really young.  Pretend it’s the New Year, put the kids to bed and then have fun!  I did get to the age where I was allowed to stay up until midnight.  Not that I can do it now, but I was proud and cranky when I finally got to.  I’ve got the party hats and noise makers to prove it!

With my kids we did the traditional camp fire.  If anyone got tired I could take ‘em home and tuck ‘em into bed.  They very seldom wanted to, but lil’ heads nodding was a definite sign.  Sometimes good snacks, guns and fireworks just ain’t worth it.
The BEST place to spend New Years Eve is Mexico Beach, Florida.  It’s a DOUBLE-whammy!!!  

Mexico Beach is on the Gulf of Mexico, and right next to the time line.  You get to start in Port St. Joe, enjoy the fireworks, and then move on to Mexico Beach to do it again.  There’s a bus system that takes you back and forth all night.  

Our tradition was to stay at the El Governor, and we took the granddaughters once for New Years.  Fifth Floor room (those are the best) and the girls had a blast.  Right on the ocean (they were proud to use the escalator while we supervised from the balcony), heated pool (which we laughed at because of chattering teeth getting in and out – but they were bound and determined to swim at the end of December), swam in the ocean (in jeans and t-shirts) and we didn’t have to go anywhere; full kitchen.  They could see both set of fireworks from the balcony in our room.  They could also crash in cozy beds without having to travel or be drug around anywhere when the festivities were over.  

Mexico Beach was hit hard by Hurricane Michael, but they’re coming back.  I’m wishing everyone a Mexico Beach Strong Happy 2019!!!   

- Bess Tuggle

Bess Tuggle

30 December 2018

The Top 12 TPC Stories of 2018

*ed. note: what follows are the top 12 stories of the year here at The Chronicles based on total views here at the website & also the number of views at TPC's Facebook page. Each story will be numbered with the column title (which will also be a link to the original piece); date; lede (if there is one), or a very quick synopsis; along with a key quote or "money line" & possibly an editor's note, with another link at the end. Hope you enjoy! - MBM 


The Top 12 TPC "REAL Stories" of 2018 


7 February 2018

#BulldogBob readying his defense of Covington's interests

Three hour "Kangaroo Court" ends with no action taken against McKelvey & Rhodes amidst a "cop out" by Newton BOC 

"Watching Robert (Bob) H Stansfield today was like watching a lion mauling an antelope on the Discovery channel."
Read the original article... 


Common Sense Prevails: The Anderson Avenue Gazebo WILL Stay

19 December 2018

The Historic Walker & Cora Harris Gazebo* at the Corner of Anderson & Thompson
 Downtown Covington, GA 

Covington Board of Adjustments & Appeals (BOAA) votes unanimously to approve variance

*ed. note: this is a piece that no doubt would have finished higher if it'd hit earlier in the year. The feedback on this one was extraordinary, especially on social media & particularly with the familial dynamics of the Harris & Atha families. All's well that ends well & I'm just so glad that things worked out the way they did for Carla & Ray. 

Read the full article here...


McKoon the Clear Choice for Secretary of State: A TPC Editorial Endorsement

16 May 2018

He was the ideal person to be the holder of the Great Seal - MBM
"McKoon is known throughout the great state of Georgia as a staunch defender of individual liberties and one of the most effective advocates for ethics reform & government transparency that we've ever had under the Gold Dome."

Read the full article here...


Kayla's Corner: 148 Strong

12 September 2018

Keeping an Eye on Covington & Beyond
"Well, the past week has been a roller coaster of emotions for us here in Covington & Newton Co. One of our protectors - CPD officer Matt Cooper - was shot in the line of duty. By all accounts, Mr. Cooper is a great, great man. A husband, a father, a public servant. As horrendous as that shooting was, our community's response was nothing short of amazing! Like so many others, I've never been prouder to be from Covington. So here's what's going on this week in town, and most of it is related to Officer Cooper. "Let's all be 148 Strong!"

Read the full article here...


Covington Councilman Josh McKelvey Tenders His Resignation from the Newton Co. Rec Commission

20 March 2018

The Councilman - A good, good man - MBM

Strongly worded letter speaks to the dysfunction of the Newton Co. Government 

TL;DR - Mic Drop

Read the full article here...

29 December 2018

A State of The Piedmont Chronicles (SOTPC) Address by Editor-in-Chief M.B. McCart & the Condensed History of TPC

Your Source for the REAL Story


| Covington, GA | Newton Co. |

To the distinguished readership of The Piedmont Chronicles,

My friends, the state of The Chronicles is strong! Very strong, indeed, and it couldn't have happened with you - our loyal readers, and we are so VERY grateful for that. Thank You! And with all of us working together, striving for that more perfect union of TPC, it is my belief that we can all achieve our shared dreams, desires & objectives, one dope-a-licious & kick-ass write-up at a time. It's been a great ride, and here's to the future! 

But seriously, 2018 has been a banner year for the ole publication, and I am truly thrilled & grateful for it. Before we get into some particulars, let's go back to the beginning.

Back in the Summer of 2010, when I first started a Blogger/Blogspot Blog to house my columns from About Covington to Madison magazine, TPC was really a secondary thing. At that time I had a site called the "East Metro Blog" where I posted some of my HS Thompsonian political ramblings, and was only using TPC for housing those pieces in the aforementioned publication. The East Metro blog had actually started up in 2005 (back in the early days of "weblogging") as a vehicle for The East Metro Atlanta Libertarian Party, a local political party & an affiliate for the GA LP that I'd started up with some friends of mine at the time (interesting side bar: the East Metro Blog was, according to him, the inspiration for a fella named Jason Pye to get into blogging), but later transitioned it to my own personal place of punditry. 

Though, really, and as a handful of folks out there can tell you, The Piedmont Chronicles goes all the way back to 1998 when I started a novel under the same name. 20 years later, after multiple stops & starts, it's still put up on the shelf but is...I'd guess it's close to half way done. I've pretty much got the rest of it in my head, but I haven't been motivated enough to try to finish it. If I do, that begs the question of whether or not I'd need to change the title to head off any confusion. Currently, I'm leaning towards calling it, "The Piedmont Chronicles: The Novel!"  

But I digress...

So, TPC...the early days. I didn't quite hit 3000 hits total that first year (2010). Over the next four years I mainly continued to just post my published writings but then started to add a few additional posts here & there & the pageviews started to grow, though not consistently, because - shocker - I was pretty damn lazy. For example, I had precisely seven posts in 2012; 2014 saw a grand total of four! Prolific, huh? The traffic increased slowly & steadily during this time but was nothing like it'd later become. 

I had a couple of outliers, though. A dedicated page on this site on the John Williams peon murders is by far the most views any post or page at TPC has ever had by a very, very wide margin. Apparently, based on Google results, that piece is one of the top-2 go-to links for folks looking to get information on this dark & sordid tale from the 1920s that happened deep in the heart of the Georgia Piedmont. I've spoken with a grandaughter of one of the Federal agents involved & was contacted once by a filmmaker. Up until 2015, the number one actual post was "A Trip Around the Dawgosphere," compliments of a link by The Senator over at Get The Picture.

Dammit it! Digressing again, sorry 'bout that...

28 December 2018

[Marshall's Music Minute] - Music Legend Ron Kimble at Rooster's in Mansfield Friday December 28th

Greetings, music lovers, and welcome back to The Minute!

The One & Only - Mr. Ron Kimble

Ron Kimble, TPC fave & Georgia Music Legend, will be playing down at that very cool spot in Mansfield, GA - Rooster's Drive Inn - tonight, Friday the 28th, starting up at 7PM, and will be joined by Larry McDonald & Mike Roberts

Ron & Larry wowing the crowd at Tubby Tom's

A good number of you know who Ron is, and a fair number of you probably know his fascinating story, but for those of you who don't - here ya' go:

Ron Kimble has been a practicing musician for pushing 50 years. In Atlanta in the early 70s Ron started to blow folks away with his amazing voice & killer guitar chops. In fact, he was involved with a very successful touring act for a time until he realized that "living in a bus & being told what to do" was not for him.

Later, at the legendary Hemingway's up on North Druid Hills Rd, Ron would start a multi-year residency - playing usually at least 3 or 4 nights a week - that brought people in from near & far to witness this "golden voice" and the kick-ass Country & Rock 'n' Roll that he'd belt out every single time! 

At this time, getting an opening slot at Hemingway's is how up & coming folks would get a foothold in the ATL music scene. Several would open for Ron during this time including a fella named Jimmy Buffet & an obviously talented songwriter that tried his very best to sort of sing, Kris Kristofferson.

Later, Ron would move on to the also-legendary Texas Tea Room, a venue he helped to found, and that truly became the focal point for Country & Country Rock in Atlanta during the late 70s & early 80s. Folks like Leon Redbone & David Allen Coe would make it their local stop on their regional tours, as did a younger fella with a well known musical pedigree - Hank Williams Jr.

But the main entertainment for the Tea Room was The Ron Kimble Band, and just like he did at Hemingway's, Ron had folks coming from all over to check out those incredible sounds. In an Atlanta Journal article in January of 1980, Ron spoke about how fortunate & grateful he was to be making a good living by being able to play music.

More folks probably remember his later residency at the Country Rock Cafe in Lilburn, GA where he played four nights a week for many, many years. As always, he had a top-notch band including a superb bass player by the name of Larry McDonald, who still plays with Ron to this day.

At one time Ron tried to write down every song he either knew or played but gave up after the list hit 700 songs! While he's best known for belting out those classic Country tunes & Southern Rock, he also has an appreciation for the singer-songwriter stuff. Dylan's one of his all time faves, as is The Band & Neil Diamond.

The list of famous musicians, in addition to the ones I mentioned, who opened for Ron or played shows with him is a long one, as is members of his bands over the years that would go on to play for the likes of Greg Allman & others. There's definitely kind of this "six degrees of Ron Kimble" thing going on. Everybody knows him; everybody respects him. He is truly a Georgia Music Legend.

So again, down there in good ole "Carmel Junction" (Mansfield, GA), ease on down to Rooster's where you can get some food that's out of sight & some ice cold beers, and listen to one of the best singers you'll ever see. 
Rooster's! Try the Fried Chicken w/ a Cold Bud!

Thanks for reading, guys. 'Til next time.

Marshall wears many hats but being a musician and a music enthusiast are chief among them. 

26 December 2018

[MB McCart] - Occupational Tax Situation: Hairdressers & Barbers Unite!

Greetings, TPCers, and I sure hope everything's fantabulous out there & that everyone had a wonderful Christmas, Hanukkah, Kwanzaa, Festivus, Yule, Saturnalia, etc. this year!

So, I've written a couple times in the last few weeks in this publication about a particular situation that relates to business licensing in the home city - the Occupational Tax. As I mentioned, this is yet another revenue source for the city that basically taxes anyone making money a minimum of $100 per year. The state allows it, so Covington, naturally, does it.

However, there is one particular subset of persons who have been required to pay this tax that many - this writer included - think is unfair: hairdressers & barbers that work on an independent contractor basis for a salon or barbershop that is ALREADY paying an occupational tax to the city. This seems like an unfair double taxation & economic hardship for these folks, in my estimation.

I've spoken with several hairdressers & barbers & it seems as if the city did not start going after every person cutting hair until about 4 years ago. It seems as if a conscious decision was made with the city Planning & Zoning department to raise this additional revenue at that time. That's something I'll be looking into further.

A couple of things to note:

The city and its P&Z staff have purportedly been telling multiple hairdressers that the state forces them to do this. WRONG! State law allows an occupational tax, but it is NOT mandatory, and the municipal government has autonomy in how it's charged & for whom the charge applies.

Of the city's total $130 million+ budget, all licenses (alcohol, etc) and occupational taxes account for approx $250,000 worth of revenue. So, a drop in the bucket, really. At most, based on my calculations, the city might be looking at losing around $10,000. Maybe we could discount the salaries of the 20 city employees or so who are making over $80,000 a year to make up the difference (or the six making over $100K!). Lolz, right? Not likely. So...what's the answer?

As I've confirmed, the city council can vote to change this at anytime, whether to do away with it or to come up with a lower, more nominal charge for folks that are in this particular position. As they almost always do with any manner of issues, some with the city fear this could become a "slippery slope" of sorts. In my opinion, freedom & equity are not slippery slopes; regardless, this is a battle that will have to be fought in the political arena. And to that point:

- Hairdressers & barbers, and their family & friends, limited government advocates, concerned citizens, etc. need to start contacting the Mayor & the City Council. Click on this link to find contact information for all of those persons. 

- Second. Several have discussed starting a petition. I have volunteered to facilitate this as I'm not just the Editor of TPC but am also a self-described Community Organizer Public Advocate & Troubleshooter. Reach out to me at: 678.712.8652 if you'd like to sign the petition or help in another way.

Strength in numbers, friends! Vox Populi & all! Barbers & Hairdressers Unite! 

Okay for now, folks. Until next time...

MB McCart

Your Source for the REAL Story

25 December 2018

Merry Christmas From TPC!

*Ed. note: Merry Christmas, everyone! Here are a few of my past Christmas columns from About Covington to Madison magazine. The first is from 2009 and the second one is a short-story that was published in 2010, and the third is my Christmas Column from 2011. Hope everyone is having a joyous Christmas celebration. Until next time...

Christmas Time’s A Comin’
~from the December 2009 issue of About Covington to Madison~

Hey everyone. So glad to be back with you again. Wow, December already! It’s hard to believe. Time really does seem to speed up as we get older. But the Holidays are upon us once again and that makes me very happy. Christmas…man, it just doesn’t get much better. A celebration of faith, love, and fellowship—it’s obviously a very special time of the year.

What is Christmas exactly? That answer can be as varied as the people you ask. For a lot of us, Christmas is a celebration of the Lord Savior Jesus Christ as we remember his entrance to our earthly world. But Christmas is also simply about love. Love of our fellow man. Love of our families and friends. And love of the things we hold most dear. While Thanksgiving is certainly about giving thanks, Christmas, for me, is just as much about gratitude. It is also about the spirit of giving. But what about the history of Christmas?

The roots of Christmas go back to the Romans. They had a festival called Saturnalia that celebrated Saturn, the god of agriculture, marking the end of the fall harvest and honoring the winter solstice. During the heyday of Rome , this was the festival and was considered the most important time of the year. Other cultures and other peoples in other parts of the old continent also had celebrations around this time of the year. In the early years of Christianity, church leaders were looking for ways to help spread the Good Word, so in the 4th century A.D., they adopted the time of Saturnalia as the “Feast of the Nativity.” Within a couple of centuries, it had stuck and December 25 to this day remains the celebration of Christmas.

For many of us, Christmas always brings back memories of being young and anxiously awaiting Santa. The origins of Santa Claus are as interesting as the origins of Christmas itself. It starts with St. Nicholas, a monk born in the 3rd century who gave away all of his wealth to help the poor and sick. He was known as “Sinter Klass” by the Dutch and this would turn into Santa Claus by the 18th century. The image of Santa that most of us have with his red suit, large belly, and white beard can be traced back to the drawings of Thomas Nast in the 19th century and further reinforced with ads from the Coca-Cola Co. in the 1930’s.

There are many wonderful Christmas stories throughout the annals of history but perhaps there is none better than the story of the WWI Christmas truce. In 1914, on the fields of Flanders  German and British troops were squared off in their trenches fighting a terrible war. Then on Christmas Eve, German troops lit candles and started singing Christmas carols. The British followed suit and in no time, a truce had been called and the fighting stopped. Germans and Brits exchanged gifts, spent time together, and even played soccer. This phenomenon occurred in several other places along the battle lines and in some cases lasted all the way until New Year’s Eve. To me, that is a story that truly captures the Christmas spirit.

One of the key aspects of Christmas also has to be the music! There are so many wonderful Christmas songs. “Silent Night” is probably one of the better known and ingrained of all Christmas songs; it was written in the early 1800’s by a couple of Austrians. Originally written in German, it was later translated to English with a slightly different melody and that version is the one we know today. “White Christmas” has been ranked as the number one Christmas song of all time by several groups and publications. Written by Irving Berlin, the original recording was done by Bing Crosby. Speaking of Bing Crosby, if you want a real treat—search Youtube with the key words: Bing Crosby, David Bowie, and Little Drummer Boy. You will find a magnificent version of that song by two of the greatest artists of the 20th century. The title of this column is a new favorite of mine. I had never heard this song until I played it a while back with the Biggers Family Band—a country, bluegrass-gospel band that I play with from time to time with my wife and her family. But probably my all-time favorite Christmas song has got to be—“Come Home for Christmas” also known as “Bells Will Be Ringing.” Released by the Eagles as a Christmas single in 1978, it is such a great tune.

As I write this column, the calendar still reads November but I am starting to feel an almost child-like excitement for Christmas that I haven’t felt in years. It will be the first Christmas for my little baby girl and I am so very excited. From my family to yours—Merry Christmas &  Happy New Year.

24 December 2018

[Perrin Lovett] - Whatever Happened to the Hot Israeli Sea Salt Selling Girls at the Mall?

This is the final C.F. Floyd National Affairs column for 2018. Boy, time flies when you’re agitating and stuff! 2018 review? No time. 2019 preview? Wait till next week. No, I got today’s idea when I read Bess’s stellar bit about hating Christmas shopping, the children’s survival notwithstanding. Such was my enjoyment that mine was the first comment:

“I miss the cute, little Mossad-ettes peddling sea salt in the malls. The rest, they can keep.”

Thank you, Bess, for planting a fantastic seed in the untoward garden of my mind. Here goes: Remember the Dead Sea salt girls at the mall? I do and fondly.

It was December 2006. Determined to waste as much money as possible buying the affections of loved ones, I strolled the crowded promenade of North Point Mall in Alpharetta. I had Baby Girl, the Old Man, a few friends, the nieces, and the dorks well covered. I needed something (else) for the Wife and something for those other womanly relations. Not being the most domestically-minded man, you can imagine my consternation.

It was, I recall, getting late. My ever-befuddled thoughts turned to ale and cigars. The pace and volume of the throng began to wear upon my fragile nerves. I needed answers, options and I needed them fast.

Then, She hailed me over. The cute little girl next to the kiosk of neatly-packaged whatever it was, she was perfect. She was shorter, maybe 5’ 1” or 5’ 2” with a slim but so curvy build. I think her hair was brown. It could have been blonde. It might have been blue. I think she had hair. But, I do remember she had a voice like velvet. With words to lull any drunken sailor, she beckoned me over. For my part, over I becked, as a puppy cooed.

The pitch I can’t recall with precision. It started softly but irresistibly: “Hiya, handsome! Nice night for shopping. It’s almost Christmas. Say, do you have any women in your life? And … have you really thought about what to give them this year?Something like that, the little mind-reader. I thought to myself, “Well, yes, it’s the women and their gifts that vex you, old bean.” I wondered if this lovely stranger had the cure for which I searched, theretofore in vain. I might have wondered what she had under those tight jeans (but M.B. said something about “keeping TPC ‘PG,’” whatever the hell that means…).

“Let me show you something,” she said, “have you ever heard of Israel?”

Now in close proximity and fully under the influence of her feminine charms (was that the perfume or was that her?), I mumbled something about Ben Gurion and Jerusalem.

“Good, good,” she purred, soft as a contented kitten, “I’m from Israel! Have you heard of the Dead Sea? Have you ever experienced its wonder? … Give me your hand!”

As I unconsciously extended, and she took my steady right hand, I hesitantly whispered something about a bikini floating on salt. I think. I could have said anything, being completely engrossed by her command and her touch.

It was masterful. I was exactly the sap … er, the mark … uh, the customer she was looking for. A lone guy with handfuls of bags in the mall at night. Christmas time. The women’s needs telepathy. Her unrelenting beauty. The Dead Sea and it’s famed, magical salts. Now, she had my hand and with it closed the deal.

As I expertly surveyed the snug fit of her top (nice!) I became vaguely aware she was doing something with one of my fingers (It’s PG! MB! PG!). She deftly whisked around some little block of a tool. There was an aromatic whiff, pleasant if salty. Was that a tongue ring!? Then, I looked at my hand.

Her cousin. Picture lifted from YouTube.

The finger - can’t remember which one, one of them - was shining like clear new chrome in the bright sunshine. The nimble minx gave me a mini manicure! And, all she used was a drop of Dead Sea something and a foamy pad thingy. I was stunned. I’ve never had pretty nails, not before and not since.

When my gaze and attention finally returned to those sweet, plump, immediately post-Turai Rishon lips, they were already explaining that, as impressed as I was, could I imagine the delight of my wife, my mother, and my mother-in-law … maybe a sister or sis-in-law. (Damn, she was good).

She asked me how many numbered the females in my life and patiently waited as I mentally tallied them. That number of little gift boxes she took off the kiosk and placed on a short counter shelf. Then she (torturously) pressed her body close to mine. “Now,” she sighed into my ear, her head resting on my chest, “now, something extra special for that extra special woman.” At this point, I would have happily signed a mortgage for the Chrysler Building. The sweetie, she let me off easy and cheap.

A few more boxes of … some stuff (bottles maybe?) ... and she said I was ready to go. Maybe $150 was all it took to round out my shopping. Cash or credit? As she bagged my purchase she hit me with the sobering disengagement: “YOUR WIFE will love these! Thank you so much for your business!” At once she reminded me that: one, I had no chance, that I already had my someone special, and; two, we were done and I was now free to resume my ambling mall business.

Our parting was bittersweet. Happy to have the salty goods, I knew I would miss hers. Recovering a little alpha, I gave her a squeeze. (I was not completely overcome). To ease my recollection and stroke the old ego, we’ll say she gave me a parting kiss. Yes, that will do…

Now, surely you remember these sweet, cuddly, and cunning visitors from afar, from the land of sea salt, towel-draped, rock-chucking malcontents, and of the Temple Mount. I saw these girls several times in the following years, usually at Christmas time and always in the malls. But, I haven’t seen them lately.

I don’t go to malls EVER if it can by any means be avoided. Yet, now, even if I do go, the girls are gone. My quip about Mossad was just that - it turns out only a select handful were actual spies, sent to malls near military bases, tech installations, DC, and wherever John Hagee shops. Most were mere Visa violators and the alleged victims of international con artists. This 2014 Times of Israel article explains the scheme, the supposed outrage, and the sad modern absence.

I’m sure that some of the darlings were misled. I can imagine that some schmucks were taken for way more than $150. I’ve read similar concerns in other stories. One thing they all miss is that the sea salt worked! I gave it out as female pacification emolument for a few years and I never heard anything but mighty praise from all of the recipients. Roses and chocolates take a backseat to the Dead Sea sodium crystals.

I miss the girls. An older, meaner, leaner, and (now) single fella, I would be head-over-heels for the commodity transactions of any young Erika from Tel Aviv. I accept that it’s over, passed like Santa and Karmelkorn, gone like Aladdin’s Castle. You can keep the rest - the crowds, the plastic junk, the fat scooters, the miles of empty handicapped parking - all of it. I’ll take my memories and go back to where budding curmudgeons go to relive the past and make sh!t up.

Christmas is over. So is 2018. I’ll see you next week in 2019.

Perrin Lovett

[Bess Tuggle] - Memoirs of Surviving Children: Christmas Memories

Okay, folks.  Guess I’m going to share a short montage of Christmas memories for your holiday enjoyment.  There is no rhyme or reason to my memories, but there are giggles along the way.

Christmas was a special time with a litter of kids.  It made shopping FUN!  Thing 1 got all the toys I loved as a child.  Thing 2 got all the toys I wanted as a child.  Thing 3 and 4 threw blew my mind.  OH MY GOSH!  This didn’t –exist- when I was a child!  Believe me, I played with ALL of them before wrapping ‘em.

Then we have the wonderful presents that you forget need assembly before wrapping.  Oops.  Stay up half the night, put ‘em together and get woken up at 5 a.m. because it’s Christmas!  

Note to parents and grandparents: REMEMBER THE BATTERIES!!!

I developed a hard and fast rule early when it came to my children – what’s opened at Gramma’s stays at Gramma’s.  If it made noise, had a lot of parts, needed batteries, or HEAVEN HELP (coming from someone with granddaughters) had glitter, it wasn’t coming home.  There is a special place in hell for anyone that gets a child slime with glitter in it.

My grandmother, known as the Queen in our family, was also the Queen of Christmas.  When I was little she had a notebook with everyone’s presents in it, and we had to open them in order, sometimes back-to-back sitting on the floor if we got the same thing and she didn’t want us to see it until we opened our own.  She passed that trait on to me.  I do it.  I can pull my notebooks and tell you every gift I’ve gotten kids and family since 1996.  Scary.

My mother schooled us this year though.  Thanksgiving was at her house (we kind of take turns) and she not only had grandkids bring her decorations down from the attic but decorate her house!   In my dreams… 

One of my favorites is the Christmas tree tradition.  We always had real trees.  They had to be cut down and left outside overnight so all the resident bugs could vacate.  

Out here in the boonies, little boys were potty trained on trees.  My nephew, little as he was, walked by two bathrooms and went outside to pee.  Usually he and the rest of the boys would go out to the big oak in their grandmother’s front yard, but this time he took a short-cut.  The Christmas tree was standing on the side of the house to be brought in the next day to be decorated and it was chilly outside.

It’s been called a Pissmas-tree ever since.

Bess Tuggle

23 December 2018

Happy Festivus 2018: MB McCart's Annual Airing of Grievances

It's the 23rd of December so it's time for my...

Festivus Airing of Grievances*

2018 Edition: 

In no particular order

  • City of Covington Stormwater Utility taxes bills
  • The traffic light at Elm & Floyd 
  • All political parties, namely the national parties. When they write the history books on this peculiar chapter of American history, they will wonder how sane, semi-intelligent people let two small groups of power & money-hungry sociopaths lead our nation to near destruction. 
    • And let's not forget the locals: the NCRP for their mean-spirited treatment of your poor, pitiful Editor, and the Newton Dems for treating me like a Mossad agent/spy. Well, guess what? I'll just do what the other two local papers have been doing for years & I just won't cover your monthly circle jerks...
  • J (Jimmy) A-a-ron Brooks. Like with a lot of my close friends, I can't seem to figure out whether or not I just don't like him. Maybe that's more a commentary on me...
  • Marshall "MB" McCart for being Marshall "MB" McCart
    "What an A$$hole!"

  • Wm Thomas Craig, Esq (though he's got the old spot on College Ave looking really nice!)
  • Sheriff Brown & the NCSO for paying Atty Craig upwards of a half million dollars this past year (see bullet point above)
    So Our Legal Spending Has Increased 2600%
    So What!?

  • The federal lawsuit just filed by Atty Stephanie Lindsey on behalf of former NC Rec Dept. Director Anthony Avery. Remember the first rule of the Law of Holes: quit digging. And seriously, you're still hanging on to the redacted stuff from the ORR materials? A grand conspiracy including the County Attorney's office? Just wow...I think that's called projection. I wonder if your client wishes he would've just taken the $400,000 a year ago? Probably. Oh well, I guess we'll find out in a year or three...
  • The fact that we still don't have a Krispy Kreme, Steak & Shake or a Cracker Barrel (thx Randy Vinson), but, once again, if only we could get just a few more McDonalds, Dollar Generals & couple more pawn shops 
  • Harry Kitchen for working us over like only a slick, high-dollar developer can, and the City of Covington for being his baby-back-b!tch of a chump. Stalking his FB profile, it sure looks like he's livin' large over there w/ the beautiful people in Hilton Head. 
    • And ditto on 3 Ring. Not looking good...
  • The Newton Co. BOC for....being the Newton BOC. And the nerve y'all have for acting like an actual functional entity the last few months. This is Newton Co., people! Know your role & act like it! I'm very disappointed...
  • JC Henderson
    He's Dumber Than He Looks, Folks.

    What an embarrassment. And - wait -  yes, now I remember - I do have something to gripe about w/ the BOC, or at least w/ Marcello. How the hell are you gonna do a 10-yr lease with JC for Nelson Heights with NO VALUABLE CONSIDERATION or compensation just 7 months after the damning forensic audit came out that said he was running it like a personal slush fund? 
    • now that's more like it. That's the Newton Co. government I've come to know & loathe...
  • These people turning left onto 278 from Floyd St! W. T. F. ??!! Again, who are these people? Why are they here
  • And again, folks running in the streets! Get on the GD sidewalk! Oh, the asphalt is better on your knees, you say? Who gives a sh!t! Get a treadmill! 
  • The golf carts. Out in the streets. I know it seems like about half of Covington has 'em now. I don't like it. Not one bit...
  • The fact that Irish Bred Pub & The Listening Room closed down. A really great spot, it's such a damn shame. And for us musicians, TLR@IBP was nothing short of a dream come true. Maybe it will rise from the ashes! :fingers crossed: 
    • Ditto w/ Blair on the Square.
  • Georgia Tech. But it's always nice to beat them in both football & B-ball like we did this year. And I'm glad their new coach is talkin' smack. It'll make beating them next year that much more fun. 
  • And Auburn & Florida, naturally. Always great to beat them again. 
  • Alabama. To hell w/ 'em. I just hate 'em! 
  • The fact that left-leaning progressives have now morphed into war-loving neo-cons because DJT is POTUS
  • The fact that right-leaning conservatives are now defending gun control because DJT is POTUS
    "Vote Harder"

  • Or, Tribalism in American Politics. Team Red vs. Team Blue. Who wins? Who loses? Who cares?
  • The fact that marijuana is not totally & full-on legal in every way. More specifically - Legalize It Like Tomatoes! No onerous regulations. Stopping the current attempts by the olde model cabal/power elite & corporatists' to take total control & turn it into another big pharma-style cartel. 
  • The fact that there are so many who just don't get it. In a word, it's freedom. As Locke spoke of, it is truly our natural state, and until we get the government that matches our essence, we will always have major problems & issues. Freedom works. It always has & it always will. 

    Happy Festivus! 

MB McCart

Your Source for the REAL Story

* full piece is a work of satire. "Rhetorical Hyperbole" strongly utilized.