08 October 2018

[Bess Tuggle] - Memoirs of Surviving Children: Plastic Wrap & Other Hijinks

Summertime seemed to be a problem for us.  Well, maybe not us.  Just me.  The boys had a whole lot more time to get up to Shenanigans, and they took advantage of every single moment. 

            My boys’ spent one whole summer making bicycle trails.  The trails were elaborate.  The boys worked their butts off.  They cut scrub pines, dug out their trails, made jumps, ditches, and things I had a really hard time walking through.  I could walk down every single trail from the old house to the creek, in moccasins so they wouldn’t hear me coming, but this one challenged me.

            Then, they found my plastic wrap.  I never bought it at the grocery store – I bought the HUGE rolls from Sam’s Club.  Kinda, sorta, had to.  Bunch of kids, very few left-overs, but we didn’t waste food.  Ever.  If they didn’t eat it the pigs would.  SOMETHING would always eat it if it didn’t eat them first.  Last resort was the compost bin, so I could put it in the garden the next spring.  I’d get great tomatoes, melons, cucumbers.. and get to eat it again in some form or fashion.

Well, they found my plastic wrap, took it, and it was a major game changer on the bicycle paths.

            The boys took turns sneaking out, plastic wrap in hand, and wrapping it between trees.  You see where this is going, and you really can’t see that stuff until it’s about to take you out.  Barreling down a trail on a bicycle is not the right time to see it.  

            Racing the trails became a passion.  Up the path, down the hill, hit a jump – and then BAM!  Bike keeps going.  Kid on the ground.  No broken bones, but still…  Racing the trails was never boring.  Even trying to walk ‘em was a challenge. 

            Another special summer entertainment was stealing Mama’s braziers. 

Every single bra I owned disappeared.  Every single one.  We had one laundry room, six people’s clothes in it, so I guess mine was an easy target.

I finally found my bras.  They were nailed between trees.  My boys’ figured out you could launch more from a bra than you could from a sling-shot. 

All I can say is that I’ve survived so far.  The good, the bad and the ugly.



jack of all trades, Ms. Tuggle has been a Covington resident since the late 70’s. She's been a K-Mart cashier, cabinet builder, vet tech, office manager for a beef cattle ranch and water well company (where she was able to hold benefits for D.A.R.E. and Scouts), a court reporter, business manager, assistant at a private investigation firm, legal assistant, convenience store clerk, landscaper and elementary school substitute teacher.  Her greatest pleasure is being a wife, mother and grandmother.  Her stories are all real, and all names will be withheld to protect the innocent, and also maybe the guilty, depending on the crime & the Statute of Limitations.